#119 Entertaining on a Budget

A layoff should never stop a social butterfly from hanging up his or her wings when it comes to entertaining guests at home. Just because people have lost their jobs doesn’t mean they have to give up hosting drunkfests at their places. You know, the ones that are notorious for the wrong people hooking up at the wrong time. When there is a reputation to keep, the unemployed will go to great lengths to ensure their parties are just as scandalous as their predecessors.

The difference between hosting a shindig when employed is there is way more money to work with than when unemployed. Therefore, the unemployed are forced to challenge themselves creatively and figure out how they can lure people into their homes without sacrificing the fun to be had. Some of the following ways are guaranteed to entertain guests on a budget without having to obviously sacrifice dignity:

• Have a gourmet potluck party and challenge guests to impress with the best, then make sure to gobble everything up since it’s the first real food that’s been eaten in weeks.
• Offer to make fruit punch and keep reminding everyone that it’s non-alcoholic so that the alcoholic friend will eventually spike it and therefore increase the fun.
• Borrow the tapped out keg from your neighbor’s recent party and apologize profusely for having bought a bum keg. Make sure to express extreme disappointment so someone will offer to go on a beer run.
• Ask the employed significant other to bring home napkins, paper plates, plastic utensils and cups from the office so no money has to be spent to ruin the environment.
• Decorate with Christmas ornaments even if it’s the wrong season and explain it’s for irony.
• Play a rousing game of pin the tail on the unemployment check and remind everyone that the party has been sponsored by the government and accepts donations.
• Don’t pay the electricity bill to ensure the guests have an intimate setting to get their game on. When the hookups begin, it’s officially a party, and your work is done. Congrats for entertaining on a budget.

Tags: entertaining on a budget, stretching a dollar, Unemployed Activities, unemployment fail