#74 Desiring to Live Off the Fat of the Land

Lennie and George had the right idea when all they wished for in life was to live off the fat of the land. Of course, back then the fat literally meant living off the land, but these days can be interpreted in many ways. For the sake of the unemployed, the fat essentially means anything and everything they can get their hands on with a minimal amount of effort. Whether that means growing their own food, collecting unemployment checks, taking naps on cows, or living comfortably off whatever the world has to offer, the unemployed will freely disclose their desire to live off the fat of the land.

The dream of living off the land comes after a couple months of successfully living off unemployment checks. Having to dramatically scale back on spending would make anyone believe that they can easily master simple livin’. The idea of growing your own food, raising your own livestock, and tapping into the stock of organic, preservative-free canned and bottled goods purchased from Whole Foods with government food stamps would make anyone want to give up their modern lives. With half of the country maniacally stocking up on non-perishable goods, firearms, and urine-to-potable-water purifiers, the unemployed fit right in, except their ultimate goal would be to sustain this lifestyle with the continued help of unemployment benefits.

To get to this mindset, the unemployed don’t even have to lose everything they own. All they need is to reassess their lives, determine how far they can take living off the fat of the land, and while they’re still reaping the benefits of free money, they can buy any necessary supplies before their funds are cut off. For some, they could go as far as scrapping everything in favor of a tent, sleeping bag, and some supplies that allow them to take advantage of what they’ve learned watching “Man vs. Wild” but less extreme. Others might take to renting a plot at a community garden to grow their own fresh vegetables while earning “local produce” bragging rights. Or, the craftier unemployed folk will do a combination of tasks to ensure they thrive with minimal effort. That could involve moving back home without their parents’ knowledge by camping out in the backyard, using the spare key while their parents are at work to shower and raid the refrigerator, and hanging out at the public library to kill time before their parents go to sleep. As long as living off the fat of the land involves living off other people, the unemployed have no qualms about doing it, because they already do.

Tags: getting away, live off the fat of the land, moving back home