Like it or not, Scientologists are likely to gain the upper hand “in this economy.” With so many unemployed people loitering about in public, unable to figure out what to do with their time, the Church of Scientology is telling itself “Haha! Good thing we’ve set up home base everywhere!”
The unemployed have probably largely ignored [...]
Continue reading about #37 Taking the Scientology Stress Test Because It’s Free
After receiving their first unemployment check, a very common “just laid off” purchase is a game console like a Playstation. There are many hours to devote to doing nothing, and it’s important to prepare for a new life filled with lounging and being soiled. When pieced together correctly, an unemployment suit helps the unemployed shine in ways they [...]
When you hear unemployed people talk, they remember themselves as having been super efficient worker bees when they had jobs. They’ll boast about how they were able to juggle multiple tasks at once, manage to meet all sorts of crazy deadlines, and still make it home in time for dinner. These types of unemployed people [...]
Continue reading about #35 Going From Multitasker to Monotasker
Though it might be a rare event, eventually there comes a time when unemployed people finally feel the need to get out of their house and do something besides popping in to the grocery store in lazy pants. Like anything, unemployment has its ups and downs, and there’s always a need to be prepared for [...]
Continue reading about #34 Scouring the Internet for Free Things to Do
Some unemployed people just can’t get a break. All those laid off late last year can probably attest to this. Not only did they lose their chance at getting paid for the holidays, but they also got stuck with the worst time to apply for unemployment and jobs, because everybody knows nobody works right before [...]
Continue reading about #33 Putting Off Their Taxes Because They Owe Money
When unemployed, it’s important to set some goals for the day, depending on how ambitious someone without a job can actually be. These goals can range from something as simple as taking a shower, escalate to the level of leaving the house, and be as grand as a New Years resolution to get in shape [...]
Continue reading about #32 Failing at Plans to Succeed at Leaving the House
Ever since losing their jobs, unemployed people have been having fun testing their limits to see how far they can go without spending money. One of their favorite ways of accomplishing this is refusing to turn on the heater despite how cold it is outside. They’re already spending too much money leaving their faucets running [...]
Continue reading about #31 Claiming It’s Not Cold Enough to Turn on the Heater
It might be petty, and it serves no one but the unemployed, but there’s something so satisfying about expressing glee every time a former company makes it in the news for screwing up its business. If it’s just hearsay from former co-workers, it’ll provide sympathy for those still trapped at the company. But if it [...]
Continue reading about #30 Gloating Every Time Their Former Company Screws Up
Unless they live in a huge city like New York or are green environmentalists who bike everywhere, newly unemployed people have a snobby mentality when it comes to public transportation. These are the type of people who had a $400/month parking spot negotiated in their employment contracts so they could drive their snazzy cars through [...]
Continue reading about #29 Shunning Public Transportation Because “It’s for Poor People”
There is definitely a correlation between an increase in drinking alone and an increase in unemployment but don’t jump to conclusions and automatically cite AA’s Twelve Step program if you suspect your unemployed friend has a drinking problem. Chances are greater that your jobless bum of a friend is just enjoying the freedom that comes [...]
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