#19 Getting a Raise from the Government

When unemployed people start boasting about getting a raise, don’t think twice, it’s just Obama’s way of being nice! After the unemployed claimed not to pay attention to the goings on of the economic stimulus plan, some of their demands were heard when the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act was signed into law this week. With it, $787 billion will be pumped into the U.S. economy to create jobs and blah blah. Most importantly, it will increase weekly unemployment insurance benefits by $25 a week. It’s not much, but it’s a start, and there’s always hope for another government raise that will allow Nadya Suleman to pump out another set of octuplets!

When there was talk about IOUs being handed out instead of unemployment checks, people panicked. But now with this stimulus plan, not only are the unemployed going to be receiving a boost of $25 extra each week in free money, but their government earnings will for the most part be tax-free. What this means is the American unemployed people will now be rewarded further with extra pocket money just by continuing to (pretend to) look for a job, so they’ll be getting richer while the country is getting poorer. Of course the economic recovery stimulus plan is bound to run into some hitches, and surely there will be delays in spreading out stimulus funds as well as late unemployment checks, but it doesn’t matter. The promise itself of more money in these “difficult economic times” officially makes Barack Obama the modern day Robin Hood for the jobless. And that’s one more reason Barack Obama makes it to the list of Stuff Unemployed People Like.

Tags: barack obama, economic stimulus recovery plan, endless unemployment benefits, IOU, nadya suleman, octuplets, robin hood, unemployment check